Fuddland Chronicle #1


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P. Pig Proprietor

From the Front Page, below the fold:

The Port of Siluria – His Excellency, Grand Duke Elmer today reviewed the RFN (Royal Fuddland Navy) today prior to their departure for fleet maneuvers. After the review, the Grand Duke gave one of his thankfully short speeches, where he stated:

“Men of the Woyal Fuddland Navy, Citizens of Siluwia, and Citizens of Fuddland evewywhere, following the recent quadwennial defense weview my ministers and I concluded that the fleet was in need of wefurbishment, modewnization, and expansion. Additionally we concluded that Commadowe Black Jack Shellacque was deserving of pwomotion to the Wank of Admiwal, and ovewall commandew of our new expanded fleet.

Admiwal Shellacque and I wre convinced our wecently wefurbished fleet will pwotect our tewwitorial watews from incuwsion by those wealms that wish us hawm, allowing Fuddlanders everywhere to sleep soundly in the knowledge that Admiwal Shellacque and his bwave sailows will defend our showes.”

From the Society Page

Wolf’s Lair – The Lady Bouncee Boobees had another “falling out” so to speak during last weekends Royal Ball in honor of the Ambassador from S’Gottland. It was reported that at least two of the Ladies in attendance fainted from the incident and a young Officer of the Grand Duke’s entourage hyperventilated at the sight.

Given The Lady Bouncee Boobees long history of such ‘wardrobe malfunctions’ at court events unconfirmed sources have indicated that several members of the Grand Duke’s staff had demanded that the Lady Boobees servants be required to cinch her bustier tighter to prevent embarrassment to the Court.

Sources speaking on the condition of anonymity say that Lady Bouncee Boobee was seen leaving the gala with General Wyle E. Coyote.