Welcome to the second battle of the crossroad. The latest installment of the foolishness known as the Outlandishian Chronicles. It took a little longer than I expected when I teased this out back on January 10th. Actually the battle took a lot less time than I expected, I was just so disgusted I couldn't force myself to write up the report.
The good Earl is getting rather frantic to get a win at this point. He's already effectively lost control of half of his Realm. Tax revenues are down, the Peasants are restless, the Wenches are questioning his prowess, and he's had to actually spend some of the gold he's been hoarding for decades.
As the Earl's forces advanced he could see the Count was prepared, his forces drawn up in battle order astride the road to Bridgeton. This was not going to be the surprise attack he envisioned. “Curse that Curr,” bellowed the Earl as reached for a fresh skin of wine, “Deploy per the plan, dress lines and ADVANCE!”.
Phase 1
The Earl won the initiative by 2 and elected to go first. The first card turned was a Move card. Wrong-way-Ray on the Earls left flank commanding the cavalry including the Extra Heavy Knights immediately plodded ahead one move segement. Clearly the spring thaws were impacting his speed. In the Center of the Earl’s formation Bigus Dikus, the Roamer Mercenary general advanced one segment. (realizing that his commanders are mostly fools, the Earl attached a unit of spear, sword, and longbow to the mercenary center. And finally Captain A. Noid on the Earl’s right flank moved one segment.
The next card was undisciplined missilery.
The Count’s first card was Engines of War reload. With a maniacal cackle of laughter, the gunners let loose at the Roamer Dense Shock Infantry directly to their front, inflicting a 2 stand loss. And then reloading. First blood to the Count.
The next card was a Favor of the Gods. Set aside and Remember to use it.
End of the first phase
Phase 2
The Count won the second initiative roll by 2 and opted to go first, hoping to get his flank attack under way. His first card was crushing missilery, rolling a 4 on a D6, all of his gunpowder units can fire up one this phase. The gunners began giggling hysterically, (possibly due to smoke inhalation from the cloud of black powder), being up 1 for crushing missilery, and remembering to use the favor of the gods card, they had visions of the Roamer unit to their front going ‘poof’. Sadly, they only won the roll by 1, inflicting another stand loss on the unit.
There next card was a Melee.
The Earl Turned an Army Morale and a Melee card.
Phase 3
The Earl wins by 4, goes first. The Count is starting to feel a little unsettled. While his artillery has been remarkable successful, his flank attacks have refused to commence.
The Earl turns an Army Morale, Missile Reload (nothing in range) Crushing Missilery and Lull. The Count fails to steal the initiative.
The Count turns a Move card. Maybe all is not lost and his beautiful plan will still work.
Grand Captain Cuss-a-lot on the Count’s right flank wins 2 move segments. He sends his Mounted Arquebus forward to fire on the Earl’s Extra Heavy Cavalry, hoping to inflict a unformed result. When the smoke clears the Mounted Arquebusiers have inflicted two stands lost – however since it is skirmish fire the net result is ‘Disordered’, or down two for melee – much better than hoped for!
Next Cuss-a-lot sends the Fearsome Yellow Shield Knights into contact with the Earl’s Extra Heavy Cavalry. As the knights advance the Roamer Ballista fires and misses. Since the Earl’s Extra Heavy Cavalry are disordered, the Yellow Shield Knights can Melee without a melee card. The combat results are a tie, both sides rolling a 2, however, since the Yellow Shield Knights have a higher Morale Dice, it counts a narrow loss with no stands lost for the Earl’s Cavalry, but they become disorderd – already being disordered, they Rout. This is the first time in the campaign that the skirmish fire has actually worked/been effective in degrading a unit. The rest of the Units in Cuss-a-lots command move forward.
The plucky mounted arquequebusier skirmishers give it their all disordering the Knights as the Yellow Shield Knights follow up.
With the results being what is sadly for the Earl becoming an all too familiar scene for his Extra Heavy Cavalry.
Phase 4
The Earl wins the initiative by 2, and his first card is a Move card!
Wrong-Way-Ray gets one move segment as his blue coated Medium Cavalry focus on the unloaded skirmish Arquebus Cavalry to their front they thunder forward and the light cavalry does a skirmish evade. Their blood up, the Blue coat cavalry continues forward towards the Whirling Mass bow armed light cavalry who fire doing a nominal one stand loss, which after consoling the skirmish fire table results in the blue coat can being unformed, shrugging off the pin-cushions they mange to just make contact with the light cavalry who skirmish evade away.
The Yellow Shield Knights advance diagonally and make contact with the Count's Yellow Shield Knights.
In the Earl's center Bigus Dikus surges ahead with 2 move segments. The Earl's swords, spear and longbow on the center left flank move into contact with the Duke's Arquebusiers, who fire, causing a 2 stand loss on the Swordsmen.
The 2 units of Roamer Dense Shock Infantry advance their move ending just shy of the unloaded cannon in the Count's center.
On the Earl's left flank Captain A. Noid, apparently in shock at the rout of the Extra Heavy Cavalry stands fast (rolled a 1) until the Earl intervened and his command sheepishly moved ahead one segment. Clearly fearing the wrath of the Earl, both Heavy Crossbow units advanced. The first unit closing to point blank range with the Count's arquebus unit who fired doing one stand of damage to the crossbows. The crossbows returned the favor doing one stand of damage to the Arquebusiers. The Earl's remaining Arquebus unit closed on the Count's Light Cavalry, the whirling mass cavalry fired to no effect. The Heavy crossbowmen set them selves firmly in place and let fly a volley that caused a 3 stand loss on the light cavalry. The longbow and swordsmen advanced as well. And finally, the Earl's Right flank Medium Cavalry advanced into contact with the Medium Cavalry opposite them.
The Earl's final card was a Heroic Moment. (Remember to use it)
The Count starts his turn of phase 4 by a turning a Melee card, opting to only act with his cavalry units.
On the Count's right flank the Yellow Shield Knights vs the Earl's Yellow Shirt Medium Cavalry results in a tie, which the Yellow Shield Knights win due to their higher Morale dice. The Earl's Yellow Shirt Cavalry are no disordered and the two units remain in contact and must resolve melee again on the next card.
On the Count's left flank his Green Medium Cavalry vs. the Earl's Green medium Cavalry is won by the Count by 3, inflicting a one stand loss on the Earl's Cavalry and pushing them back 3".
The Counts next card is a Move. On the Count's right flank his remaining Knights move into contact with the Earl's Blue coat medium cavalry while the skirmish cavalry move forward.
Int he Center Cuirt-the-lesser wins 3 move segments. His unloaded arquebus unit in contact with the with the Earl's sword and spear unit pulls back, as does the rest of the command.
Captain TBD wins one segment on the Count's left flank and his Red Medium Cavalry move forward to contact the Earl's unloaded heavy crossbowmen as the Earl's Longbowmen behind the crossbows fire overhead fire, doing no damage. The Count's remaining Medium Cavalry moves into contact with their opposite number.
I took a break after phase 4, and the photos are rather sketchy for the rest of the battle, or slaughter, or debacle, or farce, whatever you want to call it.
Phase 5
Phase 5 was uneventful except for the Count turning an Uncontrolled Charge card. Both of the unloaded Arquebus units charged into contact and resolved Melee. On the counts center right flank the Arquebusiers melted with a unit of swords and lost, suffering a one stand loss. On the Center left flank the Arquebus charged into contact with the Earl's heavy crossbow and m managed to infect a whopping 2 stand loss, causing the Crossbows to rout, unreliable (the Count tripled the Earl's die roll).
Phase 6
Phase 6 resulted in a tie die roll, shuffle the decks.
Phase 7
Phase 7 was uneventful with the Count drawing and passing a Courage card while the Earl turned a Lull card and the Count failed to seize the initiative.
Phase 8
The Count won the initiative and his first card turned was a Melee card. This could be ugly with the number of units already in contact.
On the Earl's Left flank, The Count's Knights charged into the Earl's Medium Blue Coat cavalry. The Count by four and double led the Earl, resulting in a two stand loss for the Earl and his Medium Cavalry Rout, unreliable. The Count's knight pass their check and do not pursue, but are now unformed.
Next the Count's Yellow Shield Knights and the Earl's Yellow Shirt Medium Cavalry have a go at each other. The Yellow Shield Knights win by 6, inflict a 3 stand loss on the Earl's Yellow Shirt Cavalry who rout. The Yellow Shield Knights fail their pursuit check and go galloping after the retreating Yellow Shirts.
Situation on the Earl's Left flank at the start of Phase 8
Situation on the Earl's Left flank after the Melee
On the Earl's right flank, the Count's Red Medium Cavalry who was in contact with the Earl's Heavy Crossbow unit initiate Melee. A massive cloud of dust enveloped the action, horses and Crossbowmen could be heard screaming, and when the dust settled... the result was a tie. Due to the Medium Cavalry having a higher Morale die, they won the battle, the Crossbows are now unformed, and they are locked in Melee. Next the Count's Green Medium Cavalry already in contact with the Earl's Medium Green Cavalry initiated melee. (note the rock and chicken on the Earl's Cavalry in the photo below. That resulted in a down 2 for being disorders and another down 1 for a one stand loss). The Count's Medium Cavalry wins by 11, destroying the already wounded unit.
Situation on the Earl's Right flank after the Melee
The Count next turned a Move card. Cuss-a-lots Cavalry command on the Earl's Left flank rolled one move segment as the Yellow Shield Knights moved into contact with the mercenary Ballista while the rest of the command moved forward.
The Center command had one move segment and opted to stay put.
Captain TBD on the Earl's right flank one two move segments. The Count's Red medium cavalry used one move segment to continue melee with the Earl's crossbows, winning by 10, causing a 3 stand loss and tripling the Earl's roll, the crossbow route unralliable. The Count's Green Cavalry used one move segment turn 90 degrees, and another to advance into contact with the Longbow flank. As a flank attack, melee could be resolved without a melee card. the Green Medium Cavalry wins by 8, inflicting a 2 stand loss and doubling the defenders roll, the Longbowmen rout.
At this point the Earl was out of Morale chips.
The view right before crunch time for the Longbow men.
For the Earl's portion of the phase, his first card turned was a Move card.
The routers performed their obligatory move, and the last remnants of the Earl's Left flank trotted off the battlefield. And in the Center and Right flank more routers streamed to the rear. As the Earl could be heard bellowing "Advance!!, Attack! Attack! Attack!" from the rear of the formation.
Bigus Dickus, the mercenary commander in the Earl's center looked to his left and noted that there were no friendly units left. He glanced to his right and saw that the flank had been turned. Rolling his dice, we won 3 move segments. Looking around again, he ordered his lead Legion of Roamer Infantry to fire, and a cloud of Pilum filled the air between them and Count's artillery, inflicting one stand loss. He the ordered a general withdrawal.
At that point Crom interceded and decreed a freak rain storm was preventing the Count's forces from pursing.
What a train wreck. I know I create the Earl's character to not be very likable, and an 'old school' solider trusting in arrows and heavy cavalry, but geesh.... When the Earl's Extra Heavy Cavalry routed way back in Phase 2, without even suffering a stand loss, I could tell it was going to be one of those battles.
Fear not! Bigus Dickus has a dastardly plan to draw off the Count's pesky Cavalry away and make the next battle a proper Infantry slug fest. Assuming the Earl is willing to part with significant amounts of gold for such a clever plan. And if that doesn't work... The Hand of Crom may alter the dice... I mean fates... to give that buffoon the Earl a chance. Or not.
So much lead, so little time.
Ouch! Earl-y to Rise, Earl-y to Rout!
ReplyDeleteI think the Earl really needs some heavy Cavaley with fire (instead of May Wine) in their gullets!
Thanks Peter. Very punny.
ReplyDeleteUnfortunately blogger isn't notifying me of comments. Sorry for the delay in approving.
The mercenary commander has a master plan to remove all that pesky cavalry on both sides for the next battle. I just need to paint up a Pike block or two first.